Thanksgiving Weekend Canada Style
Last year as I lay in my hospital bed angry at the world, Thanksgiving passed without any thankfulness. I was angry. Very angry. It's weird how a year later, a year filled with clouds and fog, that I remember how angry I was.
I was angry I was there in the hospital. I was angry at the horrid hospital food. I was angry I had no control in anything that I called my life. I was angry if the sun shone, I was angry if the sun didn't shine. I was just plain angry. I was angry at myself, I was angry at those around me. I was mad. How could I be the one that all that "stuff" was happening to? How? Just how?
A year later the anger has somewhat abated. The rages that I often experience are somewhat passing. I have a little bit more control. A little. The clouds and fog that shrouded my mind and vision lift a little each month. A little.
Yesterday the kids and I attended CPR and AED training. On the Saturday of the long weekend. I'm thankful I was here to be able to do it. I look at my messy house, less than perfect family and am so thankful I'm here. we may not be picture perfect, we may not be pinterest worthy, but we are here. We are together. And we have a future.
I was angry I was there in the hospital. I was angry at the horrid hospital food. I was angry I had no control in anything that I called my life. I was angry if the sun shone, I was angry if the sun didn't shine. I was just plain angry. I was angry at myself, I was angry at those around me. I was mad. How could I be the one that all that "stuff" was happening to? How? Just how?
A year later the anger has somewhat abated. The rages that I often experience are somewhat passing. I have a little bit more control. A little. The clouds and fog that shrouded my mind and vision lift a little each month. A little.
Yesterday the kids and I attended CPR and AED training. On the Saturday of the long weekend. I'm thankful I was here to be able to do it. I look at my messy house, less than perfect family and am so thankful I'm here. we may not be picture perfect, we may not be pinterest worthy, but we are here. We are together. And we have a future.
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